How do I deal with my dad’s worsening memory?

Answered by Sharon, daughter of Paul

What I tried…

• Dad has so many life stories and tall tales to share – but, with his dementia, he was starting to lose these memories. I didn’t want them all to be lost and forgotten when things got worse.
• So in the early stages, I sat down with Dad to write down the stories of his life. We put them on cards in a recipe box.  We gave them funny titles. If we could find photos, we’d attach them.
• When dad started feeling down or when we run out of things to talk about, I’d pull out the stories and use them to start a conversation.

What I said…

I would get dad talking by using phrases like, “Tell me about the time…” “Remind me….” “When did you…” “What was happening here in this picture?”

What I thought about…

Sometimes it’s annoying to hear the same story over and over again so that’s why it’s good to have some variety.

A bit more about me and my caring situation…

I moved from New Zealand with my husband to look after my dad 4 years ago. When he could no longer live on his own anymore, dad came to live with us. His dementia has worsened over the years, but we try and support him as best we can.